Hehe I wanna Australian kiss.. Its like a French kiss but down under ;)
I bet farrah fawcett is having words with michael jackson in heaven for stealing her thunder
When the cops came you just told them you'd go to your time out corner.
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
i was way too optimistic last night... got back to my apartment and the porch light was still on, like i'd actually make it all the way home.
and then he tried plucking my nose hairs. lines were crossed.
Its 11am, im in the city in a pocahontas outfit, lost a heel and found a gold rolex in my lingerie.
Our sex has gotten so much better since we broke up.
All I know is that I woke up in a soccer players' dorm, and he said that I kept telling him my mouth was a "net for his balls" last night at the bar..
Seriously, it's 5am. STOP CREEPIN and START SLEEPIN!
My intervention, when it happens, should have vanilla cake....buttermilk icing.
Yeah just pls explain the dishes and the dildo. I don't want to lose my job over a dick in the cooler.
He was simultaneously rubbing my shoulders and fucking me. I'm keeping him.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
You think my vibrator will be okay in the dishwasher?
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