i wouldnt be suprised if in indian your name meant "walking lie"
what do you think about when you wanna get rid of a boner?
dying kittens.
Slept with that guy from the bar last night. Only got 2 1/2 hours of sleep. Eyes were so bloodshot this morning that the principal sent me home b/c she thought I had pink eye. God I love teaching elementary school...
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
My underwear smells like fireworks.
I think we should boobie trap our beer this time using duct tape, rubber bands, seran wrap, and urine. Trust me I have a plan and it will work.
Yeah apparently i got lonely because everyone was hooking up so i took matters into my own hands. I woke up on the floor spooning a vaccuum cleaner, a mop, 40 paper cups, and industrial grade detergent.
Attn: you have now used your free, one time admission to pleasure town. Thank you for visiting I hope you enjoyed your trip. All future trips to P.T. Will cost you full admission price. We have different pricing plans to accommodate different situations, and remember it is more of a bartering system than a set price. Your patronage is always welcomed and once again thank you for visiting and have a fantastic evening.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
Some girl just showed me her stretch marks
You need to get out of tn
I hooked up with a 20 year old last night. I feel like a hocus pocus witch that sucked life from a child.
I'm 11 for 13 getting drunker than the person who's birthday it is
Star Trek does not adequately answer all the questions that I have about alien genitals
You're wearing pigtails and giving away our kitchen appliances. Clearly, you're drunk.
well apparently i sat in the bathroom staring in the toliet at my vomit. it was blue. how was your night?
Randomize
