i wish we had vans that drove around at night but insteand of ice cream and jolly tunes its taco bell and the macarena
He started yelling "fuck the environment" then puked all over the baby trees
Even when three police cars surrounded us you kept telling us not to worry because 'only good things can happen'.
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
Sucks about the cops last night
to be honest when I first looked up I wanted to know who was coming from a costume party..
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
my six pack is really starting to show since I started fucking everything that moves
You were fucking on a porch at a party, not much privacy should be expected
Maybe I should forgo underwear.
This is a family BBQ no?
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
I masterbated to the rocky theme song. I'm pretty sure that just beat any sex experience I've ever had.
We put a ban on pants at an unusually early point in the night.
We got a noise complaint for vacuuming too much but not for getting really high and yelling about peanut butter
Have you ever gotten such awesome underwear you wish you didnt have to wear pants?
No one can explain why there is Dora the Explorer shampoo in my shower...
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