Hey, what are you up to?
Drinking wine with the guys and watching 7 Pounds.
Looking back I guess I could have changed that to beer and Die Hard.
Raise your hand if you bought 2 annoying girls shots of water. CLOWNS.
help help how do i get him away from me should i talk in a robot voice or something
This kid is too lonely to be my drug dealer.
That's fun. I just masturbated and I swear my vagina creaked.
He asked me if we could throw a lingerie party together so I guess he's single again
i'm not sure when i reached "slam my own hand in the door" status but my half attached fingernail is not grateful.
yea, there's something about a stripper whipping you with your own belt that makes you think
I just remember being happy that I got that toilet fixed so I had somewhere close to throw up
Do you think it's illegal to work at a bar if you're on probation for a DUI? I need a night job where I can meet men.
REALLY should have cleaned under my bed before I had my parents come help me pack...things my parents just found: several condoms and a bottle of lube. My mom when she found a condom: "ooo ribbed. Laura's a lucky girl"
Last night turned out to be an expensive trip to your house between the ticket and the plan b. (Well I haven't gotten that yet)
So, I'm either with my future life partner or my future life taker. And his brother. lol. I'll let you know when I get home alive.
You know it's a good night when the word slut is imprinted on your ass and your hands smell like lube.
I ate her out and told her she tasted like pumpkin pie. She screamed that she hated pumpkins and started to cry
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