HOW IN THE HELL DID YOU BLOW A .24?????
We were watching I'm a celebrity get me out of here and taking shots every time heidi said HALLELUJAH, and started spraying her hair with that stupid dry shampoo shit....and we only watched the last half hour.
kill, fuck, marry: alice cullen, hermione granger, ginny weasley.
damn... fuck alice for sure, I feel bad but i think I have to say marry ginny... and kill hermoine! I can't believe I'm answering this right now.
I forgot to mention I threw up in my wine glass AND my neighbors empty cup.
Disgusting. If I saw her naked my dick would pack up his balls and leave.
My grandpa just complimented my boobs. Im taking this as a compliment but also brushing it off as alcoholism on his part.
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
The two of us decided to throw a spur-of-the-moment parade and the next thing I know we're 4 miles down the road being followed by 65 drunk strangers
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
Just had my very first high conversation with mom
And you survived it! I'd say that earns you a "Blaze It Like a Real Adult" from the Grown-up Girl Scouts
He a gives rim jobs, because, of course a guy who opens doors and makes reservations would lick your anus..like a gentleman.
I left my parents and ran through the airport. I was like I'm not getting stuck in Atlanta tonight and not having sex.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
Drunk me wants sober me to be happy, woke up with half a dozen doughnuts in my bed this morning.
I just made myself 3 peanut butter sammies because I was too hungry to watch porn
Put down the Captain Crunch and get over here. It’s a dickfest!!
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