i really wish my pants would only unzip when im sober
you kept typing in answers.com, why are the state police calling my house, expecting an answer
There's guys at my school running around throwing potatoes shouting "remember the famine." makes me proud to be Irish.
I don't give a shit about soccer but I'm really excited about drinking at 7 in the morning
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
Do you think he woke up this morning, looked at you, and then regretted everything?
just tried to pee in the sink at wendys...need to stop letting my drunk habits get into my sober life
I'm not entirely sure what we did is legal in the U.S., but I know that couple wont be the same
Sending a dick pic with a 2010 time stamp on it is violation of proper sexting etiquette
I was about to attempt a citizen's arrest on my RA
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
Never thought I'd say this, but getting head from a skeleton was better than I thought. Happy Halloween
Current dream situation- Gordon Ramsey is my Uber driver and he's hauling around a backseat filled with chocolate covered açai berries. I'm good for eternity.
Serious question: is he hot or is my vagina just that barren?
...I just melted into my bed. I am one with the bed. I am 600 thread count.
Randomize
