she left her pants. im pretty sure she grabbed mine on accident. im like 9 man sizes bigger than her. wtf
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
There's some strange man with hair that keeps talking to us. I'm scared.
This is how horror movies start. Going to bar with strange hair guy. He's paying. Bad idea?
Ditched hair man. Got free cab ride to market. Want food. I win.
I've come to the conclusion that the only reason I fucked him was because he reminded me of Seth Rogen.
I'm drinking while I write this paper. When I can't see the screen anymore I'm gonna come out
why do cheetos always look like penises
nutella sex= disaster
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
I left after my shirt got dropped in the toilet thinking that there was absolutely no good that could happen the rest of the evening. I hear I was very wrong.
The maintenance guy says happy birthday. Also, he likes your penis balloon.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
I just watched my high school guidance counselor pee in the backyard of this party.
So you're not opposed to us ever having sex again? Because it just seems like such a waste to let a penis like yours go.
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