so I found out that he is the older brother of a friend of mine from high school
awkward
no it got awkward about 40mins later when he invited me to stay the night...with him and his girlfriend.
i just posted a lake picture of you with a dead fish in your mouth. happy july 5th.
I twisted my ankle last night doing a super high five with 3 inch heels on.
just got super drunk mixing jägermeister with my lyme disease meds. even if my face goes paralyzed, at least i got smashed from it.
She just got in car wreck. Wreck sex is better than break up sex
now you know why we've never bought a 12 pack of king cobras before.
apparently "preggers as fuck" isn't an appropriate way to describe someone...
So if you want this MFM threesome thing to happen the other guy is here and willing
Emily is drunk. We're coming to see you at work and we're bringing jello shots for you.
Please don't make me ever have to hear the words "the Queen's gynecologist" ever again.
5 minutes Isn't even long enough to bring me even close to an orgasm. How selfish. Think about baseball and fuck me you idiot.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
They tricked me into going into that room by saying we'd smoke a bowl and then they all proceeded to have an intervention with me about my love life.
Walking into her house she felt something in her bra.... It was a used condom. Sadly enough this is not the first or last time it will happen. It's time for an intervention.
Just because you can't have him, doesn't mean you can have his brother.
What about the best friend?
Randomize
