Reason #437 to hate Louisiana: Just went to the public bathroom at work. It was so humid the toilet seat was damp and sticky. Either it's the humidity or I sat in somebody's yesterday piss. I choose to believe the humidity.
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
May have caused an international incident. More details after we taxi in.
He's still filling me in on the details. mid-table dance i asked to go water skiing?
I finally looked at the pictures from last night thanks for feeding me and pulling my pants up
Lesbians had sex in my bed last night. It's a thing of pride
tried to suck my ex boyfriends dick last night at a bar... Happy homecoming from me to you
We just had an accidental Facebook titty pic scare.
This is me trying to take a picture to send to grandma. At 4. We were trying to look sober.
He's 30 years old and woke me up for a hand job. Last time I go home with someone I met through Tinder.
They asked me my level of pain at the hospital and I told them I called my ex 6 times
She's so high she just screamed into the pile of takeout boxes "which one of you gave me diarrhea"
How did people get blow jobs before text messaging?
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
Randomize
