i barfeds in our rink
Have you ever secretly resented a girl for wanting to have sex when all you really wanted to do was rub one out and go to sleep?
Sam Adams makes it so easy to keep track of the seasons.
I am too high to leave where I am...And they are listening to Stained. This is my living hell.
Giving me the bigger bowl of ramen isn't considered "romantic"
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
Then, right before he came he said "I want to buy you so many things!" What the fuck?!
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Please explain the hospital band on my wrist.
Want to come over and dangle your tits on top of me like a skewer?
Did a 4 pm walk of GLORY the next day.
Randomize