if i had a dollar for every time ive had to piece a night together like they did in "the hangover", i bet i could outsell their weekend box office earnings...
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Just got back from doctors appt. He lied. It wasn't a pimple on his dick.
I just paid $5 for a shot of el toro and the bartender wasn't even hot. Rock bottom.
My boyfriend cheated on me...what do I do?! :( JK IM BREAKIN UP WIT DAT
Feels weird sitting between two guys who've had their heads between my legs in a 24 hour span.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
so exactly what is concert sex etiquette? Before, during or after???
all of the above
For the record we tried to find 4th of july porn. Did not turn out well.
You just jumped of the couch and yelled "hidden tiger crouching dragon!" That's the answer to how you broke your finger.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Please tell me that SOMEONE, SOMEWHERE, has created a drink called a 'Tequila Mockingbird'. PLEASE.
She doesn't even know his real name...he just keeps calling himself Hans the Third
meanwhile at my house I found 2 bud heavys in the back of my book shelf crammed between a Franklin book and goodnight moon
Besides, I'm booked tomorrow. I'm planning on drinking heavily and crying in the bath.
Randomize
