the guy I was hooking up with asked me if he could wear a guerilla suit during sex.
I would have been "that girl" at the party last night if it wasn't for that girl who puked in the potted plant...
Charging the asians next door to us $5 a page to print their final papers because theirs broke. Bars close in 2 hours, lets go
Peeing in public by noon, this is not a good indicator for the day.
Swallowing. Like you said. Lions. Always.
I'm watching people hook up tonight who, when they wake up tomorrow, are going to wish they were blind.
I should probably go to bed before I start to care about why I started drinking in the first place.
I broke down outside of an all boys correctional facility
well if that's not a gay porn waiting to happen, i dont know what is...
I WISH WE COULD PLAY THE DRINKING GAME TOGETHER AND THEN BANG FOR AMERICA.
just got home to find my brothers naked on the floor covered in chocolate. i am now nervous about sleeping in the same room as them
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
We were going to play manhunt in a strip club, calling it mancunt.
Your life is quite full of dick lately.
It really is!
I just saw elmo dancing with gumby. The bars at 7a.m. are AWESOME.
Do you realize our room single-handedly hooked up with most of that wedding party last night?
Randomize