Most awkward thing ever just happened. I was reaching in my purse to get something and a condom fell out into the woman's lap next to me. At least she knows I'm safe.
She said her name was "party"
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
i found your underwear in my bra... i dont even remember how this happened.
shit. all i remember is the look on your moms face.
you have to be so drunk to ignore a taser
Well, both are illegal but one involves my vagina a whole lot less.
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
This baby is an asshole
I just think that exercising will really get in the way of my painkiller induced nap time rituals. There's gotta be a better way.
Just got biofeeze on my vag. Weirdest sensation everrr. Can't decide if I want to cum or cry
I just remembered I did the whole byebyebye dance at the bar
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
I almost got decked by a guy who looked like Mr. Clean. How was your night?
So I said "fuck it" and made myself a sandwich
woke up between a girl's legs. make your own conclusion.
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