Yo I'm just eating dinner now. U ready to go out?
Ya ya. Where you eating?
Cereal and beer. U kno u want in.
My pee smelled like sake this morning it was sooo disgusting.
So I tried to call my phone from his phone and was like, "hey, my name is not in here..I thought you had my number" turns out he has my number saved as "gives good head"
its time to go be "that drunk guy nobody knows"....again.
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
I couldn't remember if it was hamsters or Iraq that you hated. I'm so sorry.
She should get an extra 30 days for that Georgia Rule movie......terrible.
I can get orange kush...
GET IT NOW! WHY IS THERE A DOT DOT DOT?!
No, I don't not want an upside down piggyback ride. You're drunk and there are rocks.
Omg.....I raised my camera to take a pic at this presentation, and I wanted to zoom in, so I swiped my phone to the left and up pops my dick pic from last night.
I can't bring myself to turn around to see if pple saw it.
Swear to god you say cuddle bunny one more time and honest to god I will sacrifice a bunny on the hood of your car
hes that one kid that offered to spoon after staring at me for 5 minutes
I love how four vibrators are within reach of me right now, but not a single hair brush or comb
Thank you for deleting me from Instagram. Also, I'm carrying your child. Happy new year!
Just remember that no one else gets to suck his dick but you, feel honored. It's like the Olympic torch of life is being passed off to you and it's your time to run
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