I'm playing the sound guy on a porno set
dude. you ripped the mardi gras beads off the girls neck and yelled she didnt deserve them..
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
if i ever get hit by a car or something and become paralyzed promise me youll still be here to hand feed me shots and light my bowls please
God I hope the gutter I die in is nice. You know, for a gutter.
She's barefoot and topless screaming "HERE KITTY-KITTY" at a stray cat in the ditch on the side of the highway. How do I get her back in the car?
SHUN THE NONBELIEVERS. THUS SAYS THE NIPPLE LORD
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
We were getting breakfast he shit himself in the middle of ihop. Mid bite he just yells out o fuck.
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
Good!!! I'm so proud of you for not snorting alcohol. Big girl steps.
I have standards. Maybe not when it comes to men.. but definitely when it comes to sex
Okay everything with a penis is officially dead in my eyes
Was that before, or after strip tac toe.....
Dude i just passed out while getting head...she cried
Randomize
