i think the semi hot bartender might actually be a man in drag..on a similar note, what are you drinking?
She actually asked me 'is it in yet?' I deleted the vid.
You all can go fuck yourselves. As far as I'm concerned, don't come back to karaoke.
Showering in the handicapped shower. Im THAT hungover.
i don't really know how much tequila is too much
You better not fucking die before we have sex while you blow fire. I'm serious. Don't mess up my sexual bucket list.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
I bruised my vagina when I was climbing out of the trash can.
I danced on the street to dubstep on a boombox for an hour with a lesbian single mother.
I want a bunch of melted cheese. or a penis. or a penis covered in melted cheese
MAN I GOT NO SLEEP AND HAD A BREAKFAST OF SKITTLES AND ASPIRIN. I'M LIVING THE LIFE.
We could have a classy candlelight sonic dinner with fireball cocktails if you leave now. Twat tickler centerpieces.
He noticed my new Lipstick so later tonight it's going to be on his dick.
I told him I wanted to get on him and ride him to Montana. It didnt end like i thought it would.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
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