I just saw the girl you left with - Chris Hansen's looking for you
we went to a bar last night, drank beer in plastic cups. I took pics w/a random kid i pulled into a photobooth & i have easy mac in my purse. I belong here.
woke up with withdrawal cold sweats this morning. spring break must really be over.
yeah, he just sent me a picture of himself with his shirt off.... It didnt turn me on, it just made me want to buy him a big mac....
I will be sticking my dick in something this weekend. You can either be that something or not. Your decision.
He's not so smart and obsessed with sex and lacks listening comprehension skills. I feel like i'm dating a sexually competent sesame street character.
Remembering I sold my brand new Blackberry to a stranger for a few pints = Worst night of my life. Now to work out what I did with my shoes.
They said I was more of a mess than the German. I have achieved the unachievable, you may bow down to me
Btw any and all sexual fantasies or arousal I had about cops is null and void.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I can't believe he's mad at you for not remembering your fake anniversary.
Wtf is this place? I don't see any alcohol and I feel like we were supposed to bring our own strippers.
Tears For Fears is the only thing getting me through life at this moment.
Got a $290 noise violation last night for shouting "THE KING OF THE NORTH" til 2 am
I'm really interested in the size of his penis so report back on that one
Randomize
