how about we just leave your boyfriend out of this
Came home to a chalk baord that read:" Think like a rapist." Can't say I'm surpirsed.
He kissed a someone with a penis
the way she shouted out instructions during sex made me feel like I was having sex with my gym teacher
He kept saying 'your mouth is Amazing' even after I was on his dick.
At least he's not married... I hate Halloween hookups
I can't believe you just thanked me for a blowjob on my Facebook wall...
He got me an interview at his law firm and his boss asked him what he had to say about me. His response "He dates CRAZY bitches."
Well, I now know how many glasses of wine it takes for me to fuck my neighbor.
Mixed review. I fucked her in the river, but then we were assaulted by ducks.
We were suposed to have a 3some in their bathroom but it just turned into us 2 making out while he watched like a little kid on christmas morning
In case you're wondering what frozen hashbrowns taste like at 4 in the afternoon, shame. They taste like shame.
whoevers yellow car is in your driveway right now... i plan to steal. just an FYI
I got pulled over by the same cop in a 4.5 hour window. Got off both times. Fuck yes.
Walking back to my car from the campus library and just saw a Nuva Ring on the sidewalk. If that doesn't scream college life, idk what does.
Randomize
