It all came flooding back to me: there was a woman with one hand
Just saw a commercial bout this girl that lost 54 lbs on a taco bell diet. so thats my excuse.
"Take a picture of me motorboating molly" was probably not my best career move
It's like alcoholism for beginners at my kitchen table.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
I have tardy slips. and absent slips if you don't show up to the bar. and trust me, if you are absent there will be a saturday school. I'm teaching you how to drink tonight.
i figure i've seen his cum stains on the floor, i'm allowed to say these things.
Stop. He threw up in front of Madison Square Garden security. Spit at the guys feet and grunted ughhh at him.
Well I turned her sobriety into my own personal drinking game
we came up with a wnba drinking game. take a shot every play that you could've done better. won't make it through 1st quartar
Did I try to sell your body for chicken tenders last night?
I want your attention. I want your attention in the form of your penis inside my vagina.
Btw I appreciate you as a friend for taking the time to validate my sluttiness
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I just balanced a full glass of chocolate milk on my left boob. Don't think i've ever been more proud.
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