omg i forgot michael madsen was in free willy this is the most epic movement of my stoned life
Who was that guy I met at your brother's house who had to get stitches in his ass?
he handed me my panties in front of my date. turns out he wasn't that mad.
gona look into getting a tetanus booster and carrying an adrenaline shot...its going off this weekend
I feel like despite his sleaziness I could be friends with this man. he just sent me a picture of his dog's balls.
Irrelevant. Does he have queso? That's the real question.
The bag I'm bringing home for the weekend: a change of clothes, workout shoes, and sex toys, that's it.
I just got a job offer for Australia. Unfortunately I have given the name of Whitney
Its not often you get to say, "The security guard at my job is my new drug dealer," but as of last night, I get to say it.
I am having telepathic thoughts with my cat. He loves me and wants me to blow his nose
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
Like the fear of satan was put into my heart when I saw him put that sandwich on the WOODEN BENCH
You wrapped yourself in tin-foil and told us you were Iron Man. I have pictures.
I just fuked with kevins application and made it say that he does conjugal visits for community service
hey some people donate their time while apparently kevin donates his body
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
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