Also, I'm sitting at a crosswalk watching two Mexican gangs fight each other. I miss you too. A lot.
Oh my god you would drunk register for a marathon.
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
She agreed that we could have sex whenever I wanted and I could let someone else meet my mom.
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
I slept with a married guy last night and then broke my toe on the doorframe on the way out. I've never seen karma work so fast.
The important thing is not that we avoid making mistakes, but that we avoid learning from them.
All in all only spent $2 at the bar ln... Fucking love having a vagina
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
Imagine Arby's curly fries spiraled around a dick
I smoked a joint in the bathtub at 8 am then went back to bed
I am drunk at 8am listening to Cyndi Lauper and dressed up in a penguin suit
I have alotted at least an hour for ugly crying.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
Randomize
