just come out here and I will go home with you...
yeah that facebook group of people who have had sex with me probably isn't to discreet...
did you know that snuggie is the perfect anti-freak out aid for stoners? it weighs you down so you can't go anywhere. just sit there and enjoy the movie, that's right.
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
I now realize that they made gum to take the taste of dick out of your mouth.
I left your tip in your mailbox. Last night was amazing.
Got into Princeton. So excited about the mommy-issue-over-achieving-cock I get to ride the next 4 years!!!
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
idk i usually just blame everything on steve
Steve quit two months ago
Pumped to get "pass out-wake up in Berlin-buy a chinchilla" drunk?
So hypothetically speaking.. say someone dropped their birth control pill in a hot bowl of soup, and it possibly disintegrated.. would it be just as useful?
Ah Christ I think I've reached the single life mentality 100%. I just inquired a photographer about a photo shoot with my dog.
I haven't even lived here for 24 hours yet, and I've already banged someone. My new hoe life is off to a great start.
just had an allergic reaction to my dildo. My life is ruined.
It's been a week I should not still be finding glitter in my pants.
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