Eating a burrito bowl w/ queso sauce is about as cool as the first time you have sex w/ out a condom
I thouht it was time to go to sleep and suddenly I was front row on brokeback mountain
Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
Please tell me you saw the asian lady with the medical mask on cutting her lawn with scissors.
The way I'm gonna look at it is, if you don't makeout with your roommate once in college, you didn't do something right.
She is just sitting by the bathroom like a little puppy waiting for a knight in shining armor to take her in there to fuck her. New low?
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
They just dared her to tape flip flops to her tits. Entertainment value cannot be found like this in any other part of America.
I walked into her room to find her sitting on the end of her bed with her heads in her hands talking to herself. She kept muttering things like "What? How? No. What? I don't --- How?" $10 says she's pregnant.
I'll see to your $10 and raise you $40.
He made the moves first, we made out...then we folded his laundry.
You were making out w/ur brothers coach against a door when someone opened it and you both fell through... Then you continued to make out on the ground
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
I'm really just disappointed in myself for having sex with a musical theater major
THAT'S MY GIRL
KICKING BUT AND GETTING PEOPLE INTOXICATED
HER BOYFRIEND CAME HOME WHILE WE WERE GETTING IT ON IN THE SHOWER
At least you smelled nice while he kicked your ass.
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