I am coming home for anal
* a nap*
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Everybody was literally kung fu fighting
Just passed a strip club with a Marquis sign that said 'tis the squeezin'
Just watched a guy pause a bluetooth convo to puke outside of esso. gotta love orangeville
I dont think yelling "Grab your dicks, time for pics!" helped your case either.
Used a cardboard box as a pillow and a towel as a blanket. Its like the great depression over here
I miss yesterday.Today's hangover makes yesterday's look like a little girl with blonde ringlets playing hopscotch in the street with a ginger kitten.
I'm having a hard time existing right now. When I figure out how it works ill be over.
I'm too old for chlamydia. That's for 20 year olds who go to clubs and do drugs I've never heard of.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
Ahha guy saw me buying beer, went "hmmmmm" and nodded his head approvingly. No words exchanged, but he has made his way to my heart haha
During my first week as an adjunct prof, I played a fiercely fought game of squash with a law student and we wound up having hot, sweaty, angry sex right on the floor of the court. She is either the best or worst thing to happen to my academic career. Will let you know.
You were sober bartending last night right?
Sorta. I remember you crying, ripping rose petals off the flower stem and slowly sprinkling them behind the bar at me and singing softly
Romantic
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