Tell him to shut up cuz i said so. I lost my dollar shoe :(
Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Well its official I'm an idiot. I made out hardcore with an employee last night in our banquet room. Oh and got wasted at work. Oh and showed my staff squirrel on a trampoline.
just told my prof that "i dont give a fuck" about the final. nothing like a having a signed employment contract already
Also, the wait staff kept prematurely clearing my Manhattans. Not sure if it was an oversight or a hint.
A guy just washed his hands in the toilet. No joke
My night consisted of weed, sex, and Mexican food. In that order. I think we found the keys to saving our marriage.
If it makes you feel any better, karma just served me up a big dose of fuck you.
NEW INFORMATION meech found me passed out on a bench outside.
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
He may not be fully over his current wife yet. But wait until I show him my tits in his office at the end of the day tonight.
I think I maybe realized he was too old for me when I went into his bathroom and he had anti aging face cream.
I made an executive decision to rename my Resume file to something other than MONEYMONEYMONEY.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
It baffles me why I still wear white underwear...
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