I got so many pubes stuck in her braces that when she yanked her head, I cried out like that one girl you "accidentally" rear-ended last week. Bald spots are battle scars.
hey did I tally my arm again of # of shots?
nope, you were tallying rejections at the party
It's either jizz or frosting, and either way, someone's being held accountable.
I'm not gonna not go for it, she's foreign and pulled a shotglass out of her thong.
better to have posed nude and lost than to never have posed nude at all...thats what i always say
I just shaved my vag with a razor my dad left when he was here a few months ago. Too hungover to think about the Freudian connotations
I let him do a line off my nipple in exchange for his prescription pain pills. I feel like 3/4 Vegas stripper, 1/4 underbelly of society.
Looks better than the half a blow job I got the other night which I had to finish myself. From a chick I refer to simply as "mom jeans".
That girl definitely just ate a hot dog and stared straight in to my eyes.
I couldn't find pants for like 20 minutes so I was butt ass naked just sitting on your floor
Just got offered bathroom sex. I've never been more flattered.
Indeed. If boner pill commercials have taught us anything, it's the importance of waiting until the moment is right.
Where else would I get life advice?
I hope Trump leaves Planned Parenthood alone for at least another month. The week got away from me. #whorelando
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
If u could sum last night up in one word?
omgwtfpineapple
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