Well whatever you do have, it sure worked on me.
A Penis?
He picked me up for our 1st date and saw my roommate crying on the floor Fabreesing her vagina...
His blow is so strong I threw up. Buy it. I'm in nursing school I know what I'm talking about.
Why i have shady connections. Owner just txt me asking to come by and judge the new stripper.
I just saw him carrying his little sister while walking his puppy. And he was shirtless. I swear my ovaries just exploded
i told myself when i was 16 i would never fuck an Alan. now i've fucked 3 and i'm punching my 16-year-old self in the face
Seriously. Come back. I've had two beers for breakfast so far. The third will be for lunch since it's already 12.
My genitals don't want beer. They want to not feel like they wandered into a hornet's nest.
List 10 things your GF won't do for you, and we can work through that list.
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
Just keep me informed about your plans. That way i can figure out places to go and if i need to shave my balls
I sprayed his whole room with my perfume and left lots of my hair on the bed. So now if he does bring her home, the bitch will know this territory is marked.
I have 4 more smokes and 6 more beers to go before I make a life changing decision like that.
Randomize
