I need to start cutting my cocaine with Plan B
I just figured it out. Meghan has the same smile as Sylvester Stallone.
his pokemon pajamas? the fact that he was proud of the stretchmarks on his arms? or finding out he has a daughter that went to high school with us? ...you tell me what was the dealbreaker
Stop introducing me to people as your little sister.
I don't think the lady gaga poster on your wall qualifies you as a brother.
Snuck into a camper in someone's yard. Hotboxing. Can't wait until they go in it.
wearing my roomate's scarf as a dress...halloween 2011 ladies and gentlemen
I sent two dick pics to a wrong number and one was in .gif format so it was helicoptering all over the place. I single handedly ruined a child's life.
He initiated the conversation by sending me a picture of his penis at 4 am
Well sort of got busted by a cop while having sex outside, so your call
Like I want to yell at him for pissing on my floor but there's still a chance its my pee....
I lost the right to judge tonight
I just showed this kid my nipples to work my shift tmw
I get so sad when I watch him slowly destroy his life with whiskey and cocaine. Then he bites my neck and I just want to fuck him. I can't help it.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
when part of the plan includes getting high, i usually forget how the rest of the plan goes.
Randomize
