playing new game: drink everytime u see someone at the beach with a tramp stamp, double if u guess it before u see it, triple for male tramp stamps
warning: blackouts possible when playing in ocean city or anywhere in new jersey
is it bad i banged a 25yr kindergarten teacher last night?
No thats like a top 10
I have blocked the memory from my mind. He is just a fuzzy cloud floating with my other bad decisions..
Lesbian sex in an alleyway drunk.
they lined up to high five me when i got taken out by the stretcher. The paramedic high fived them too
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
oh no, don't get me wrong.. she IS really pretty. If you are in to horses or Sarah Jessica Parker.
Reminder: You could have had sex with me while wearing a tiara.
I just smoked a joint and ate a sandwich while watching someone get arrested. Bonnaroo is a silly place.
The porch is breathing.
STAY OUT OF MY SHROOMS YOU CUNT
Strip Simon Says: DO IT
Next time you decide to go downstairs hungover, please warn me. I now have to explain to twenty eight year olds why you were naked.
so in 24 hours i have gotten caught having sex in my car by a cop, almost burnt off my vag, almost got hit by a semi, and got fired. awesome.
I am that special "drink water and be grateful I'm alive" kind of hungover
Look don't ask questions just know that one thing led to another and I have a shot glass stuck in my ass. I need your help!!!
Randomize
