i love being in ibiza. their hotels are much more receptive to walking around naked in the lobby than our american ones.
I think he may have overheard our "how much coke would you fuck me for" conversation last night...
Before he took off his pants he paused and said, "Remember..sometimes great things come in small packages."
was it morally wrong to have used his girlfriends makeup after i fucked him?
his mom cheated on his dad so i think he has a weird freudian thing for whores
There's a bed on the roof. The window behind it is too small for it to go through. I'm impressed.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
Let's run into the wild and just eat berries and have sex all the time.
He threw a twenty at the stripper and asked for change
well did he get it
....yes
I'm not sure how to explain it, but I feel like our penises have a connection. Like long lost brothers. We're not even gay.
I see your boobs were ready to greet the new year.
I mean honestly, what would you have done?
Not screw her in the church house?
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I woke up with a pillow, shampoo and a plant in my fridge. Eggs in the toilet, and I was wearing three pairs of girls underwear. What happened last night
Sorry I missed your call earlier. I was getting high with my high school band teacher.
Randomize
