Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
Too late. I'm going over there. I'm a bad example for all women: Do as I say, not who I do.
Whenever I don't wipe thoroughly after shitting, I just think that anyone if anyone sticks their finger up my ass, they had it coming.
yes we did fuck in his chapter room. yes it was demeaning. and yes, they probably will discuss it at chapter tonight.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
My econ prof just gave me a shot glass because I was the "randomly picked" winner of the lecture. Ties into our supply and demand lecture, supplied with a shot glass, demand a thirsty thursday
what whaaaat?! I BET YOU WIN IN THE TEETH DEPARTMENT.
Reached a new low. Drinking Wine from my thermos while on the stair master.
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
Being drunk is way better. Seriously, I just licked your brother to make sure my spit was actually real.
She got tired so now we're making anyone who has a stupid idea go into her bedroom so she can sleepslur "good idea" or "baaaad idea." We're calling her the queen of the misguided.
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
He's my blizzard buddy. We're blowing lines and doing a 3D game of thrones puzzle
my dad walked in on me peeing into the trashcan in our kitchen last night at like 2am. wtf
What’s the best way to find out if he’s into anal?
I think you have the wrong number, but good luck with that
Randomize
