I feel miserable, can't drink that much when I go out
We've been saying that since '98
I want to make Jon&Kate babies with him. Not in quantity, but in percentage asian.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Alcoholism comes in two forms... Us.
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
Although I commend your efforts to keep my penis away from her, your sister is now booty walking up my stairs. Good game though, good game.
it's my birthday, i should be around people i want to fuck
I told him I'd clean his cock if he ever sent my GF another text message. It was a horrific time for me to miss the l key on my iPhone.
2012 needs to end already. I've exceeded my quota for People Who Have Accidentally Seen My Tits.
I woke up in an apt hallway this morning and a nice lady brought me coffee cause she thought I was homeless
He was too drunk, and my mother and I ended up babysitting him. He told her I have amazing mouth skills, and that I love the "chorizo" he feeds me. All she said was "And on the list of 30 things you never want to hear about your daughter..." while gripping the steering wheel.Please just fucking kill me now.
You know what? The sex was so bad that I don't even care that I gave him strep.
How weird would it be for me to get 1 hour photos printed at CVS of my partially or all nude?
Can I just go to one establishment in which I haven't banged anyone ?
Her hand jobs are magic. They smell like vanilla and awesomeness. She made me forget how to walk
Randomize