Did I miss anything?
A gay irish pirate, a caveman and hunter s tompson.
so we also did drugs
Five things that make you perfect. Go.
The skin of a dead hooker. The blood of the innocent. The soul of a kitten. The hat from cat in the hat. And sunglasses.
i've been called drunk 4 times today and it's only 3pm
You were pissed we didn't change the movie to Eurotrip so you kept singing "Scotty Doesn't Know" over and over until you passed out.
Idk what else to talk about besides you paying for half of my vaginaplasty.
New level of stoned. My Terry's Chocolate Orange didn't 'whack-and-unwrap' so I ate it like an apple.
Well the strippers have danced to goo goo dolls and green day, time of your life. Were all gonna commit suicide.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
We went to the casino to try to earn enough money to go to new Orleans comfortably. I'm already drunk. This is a horribly immoral start to summer.
Something like that. Healthy diet of beer, ranch sunflower seeds and sex keeps me young.
Well, I was giving him a handy and I sighed in boredom. He heard. I had to fake moaning sounds after he asked if I sighed.
Got pulled over today for going 90 in a 40 zone with my leg out of the window. Still got out of the ticket. I'm getting way too good at this. Wanna trade bodies so we can see if it's my boobs or my charm?
I gave him a hand job in the parking lot... now he thinks we're meant for each other...
this bedazzled flask is my best investment yet
I'm going to leave the 5 dollars that fell out of my bra while fucking in his room on the dresser as an apology
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