why do they call them blowjobs? ....unless i'm doing it wrong?
Becky drew a cock on my face and is making me sit on the step.
what did you do that she drew a cock on your face and supplemental questions why did you let her?
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
come on don't hate me. your brother looks just like you its almost a complement that i had sex with him.
I just masturbated to the audio from my psych lecture . . . this screwing my prof fantasy is getting serious.
You slept with a red coat way too close to independence day. It's just very unpatriotic.
next time we drink: battle shots.
battle shots or battle shits? if its the first, explain. if its the second I think I figured it out.
All i'm saying is it doesn't matter how drunk you were, at 26 years of age you should always remember to take down you pants before you shit in the toilet
So while you were living in this woman's apartment, you acquired a room mate, fucked her daughter, and killed her bunny. Worst sitter ever
He does impressions. Handy knowing you can get fucked by one guy and pretend a group of celebrities is running a train on you.
Stop chatting and get in the fucking car. I didn't get my asexual ass out of bed just to watch you flirt and fail with someone you're never going to see again.
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
YOu just turned down my vagina. Something must be wrong. Vegas changed you!
twas supposed to be night one of rebound break but it was night one of get sloppy drunk and dance half naked in an ice shack
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