Its only 8 and she is already passed out
Perfect here is wht u do. Gently slip your index middle and ring finger into her butt hole but gently u dont wnt to wake her..let me know when ur ready for step 2
Cant decide who was more of a mess the morning after... me when i passed out in the bathroom stall or you when you sprayed yourself down with hairspray thinking it was sunblock
Taking shots out of pine wood derby trophiesssssss. best idea ever.
Day 8 of being sober: Sniffed an empty beer bottle at a restaurent and almost licked it. This is not working
At what point should i just give my brother a break and stop sleeping with his friends?
i'm sure the inside of her vag looks like Normandy circa 1944
and yes i had to double check that date for that joke to be accurate
this is not the first time I've had hot dogs and 151 for thanksgiving.
I'm in a waiting room at the hospital - and there's a dude here who is WAY too proud of his urine sample.
My high school reunion is Thursday so I need to find an outfit that says "Haha, you got fat and I got tits. Suck it, bitches."
If I end up in a healthy relationship because of this, I will NEVER forgive you!!!
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
I put on a tiger onsie to initiate sex... It worked
you're not celebrating your 21st birthday right unless you give a male stripper a hand job, flash the bartender, and win a free vibrator.
hey, i didnt think i could be this stupid either but you dont see ME getting all judgemental about it
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