So you started off by saying "no homo," but patting his crotch and saying his jeans fit him wonderfully may have overshadowed that.
He just refered to Steak and Shake as "a good place for couples". I will definitely not be shacking tonight.
I didnt shave my beard last night, so I could feel it while Im shrooming today
obviously he has no clue about college dating. it goes drunken sex then the 1st date
Apparently you can coat check a keg.
Fuck I keep finding new battle scars from our fight. Justin told me I stabbed you with a broom handle.. Do you remember ripping my pants off?
Apparently he proposed after he saw me chug vodka out of a traffic cone.
Trying to find a reliable dealer on Rockfordmugshots.com. Guy arrested for 15 grams of coke could be him !
You realize those people have been ARRESTED recently. right.
I pretty much just wake up, masturbate at least twice, and go to the beach. #Unemployed. I do look for jobs in between all that tho.
Now just crop his dad out and add it to the spank bank.
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
i'm now remembering the last part of my nigght....ugh. apperently i bargained with the wendys drive up girl after they closed and got "w/e they had left" for $7
Nice classy night out before we roll our faces off
My ex just brought my grandpa weed. Not sure how I feel about this.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Randomize
