And mexicans. My burrito likes you.
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
There are few people I can ask this w/o being looked at as insane... Do you ever some days get fascinated by how amazing your own breast look?
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Just bought a german beer stein with tuition cash. no regrets
my dad just told me he wants a furry wall in the house... i'm proud and concerned
drunk making out is the fucking beeeest. specially when it's your exboyfriend
I wonder if you'll be as excited about this as you are now tomorrow morning.
I think "banned from Amtrak due to excessive projectile vomiting" would sum up the evening quite nicely.
We should have cut you off when you asked the can driver if you could ride in the trunk.
The last thing I remember was paying off her younger brother not to judge me, then puking on his shoes.
My saliva right now is around 7.6% alcohol/volume.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
Thanks for the bagel and the sex.
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
He poured champagne on my pussy while he ate me out. I found my unicorn.
Randomize
