I woke up this morning and "The Wood" was on tv. Touche TBS, touche.
So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
Oh and discovery of the day is it's the channel, not the time on your cable box. Thought it was 2:16 for 4 hours
My number went up to seventeen today. I forgot to add my random hookup on a sailboat.
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
So I cleaned the toilet last night at 2 am and woke up with pink eye. Never doing that again.
On the bright side, at least we arent the generation raised by fucked up teen moms.
we took shots then she made me eat a dill pickle with cream cheese wrapped in a piece of turkey.
He just tagged everyone he's slept with this year in a 'memories of 2011' tweet
There's not an emojicons for I think I ripped my asshole and want to die.
Doing Jager Bombs on a Sunday morning is justified...How else is my team going to win?
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
Drinking and pointing where stuff needs to go is hard stuff.
Your face; I've seen enough of it for today. Go away now please.
Randomize
