Dude, we have the same penis size. Best friends for life.
i'm home, then i'll come over
ightttt gangstaaaaaaaaaaaa
nvm.
i got a mint flavored condom from wellness day...im kind of tempted to taste it
i have a "get your shit together" dinner with my parents tonight. After that ill be down to party
Thanks for last night. Sorry if i was obnoxious. I respect your morals and i wouldn't want you to lose your virginity to a drunk girl in your mom's prius.
You were air-planing a joint into my mouth while I was crying naked in the bath tub.
Best Friends For Life.
Nothing ends a night of heavy drinking better than banging to three six mafia in your own driveway
I don't understand why she gets annoyed by my drunk texts. It means she's who I'm thinking about even when my brain isn't functioning properly.
What if everything solid was made of oreos and everything liquid was wine
I just got chills
I'm pretty sure the girl in the stall next to me is waiting on me to leave so she can poop but I'm doing the same thing so it's like a Mexican standoff
I have woke up on a strange couch, in a strange house, on another campus. Can you Friend-Find me and pick me up?
You were throwing cups at people in the basement, yelling at them to get out of your swamp.
We just catapulted a jelly bean off of his hard dick into his mouth.......Happy Easter!
My disapointment is making my balls hurt :(
Lately I've been very attracted to Kevin Jonas because he's like...less hot than Joe, but he's this healthy mix of both Joe and Nick. It looks like he's finally growing into himself.
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