You're in luck. The brownies don't even have butter, just vege oil
he pissed his pants, and she still wants to hook me up with him. I try not to date guys with bladder control problems... Unless they're loaded anyway.
Plus she can make a mean sandwich! That's all I really need. Well that and foot jobs...
I have the Lakers game on, but all I can think about is having sex with you. Not sure what you've done here.
My neighbors are outside blasting Hootie and the Blowfish while drunkenly hitting a stump with a hammer. I could get used to this.
What are you doing St Patricks day? I'm banned from all work parties with open bar ever since the cinco de mayo party that I dumped a drink on my co-workers head and played air guitar on my boss' ankle cast.
There was a cop outside the house so we just put the alcohol in this watermelon
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
That bar is one yeast infection away from total annihilation.
we're the same shoe size and he owns more pairs of heels than i do. this could be the beginning of a beautiful friendship
I have bad memories with every alcohol but we manage to work through the problems for the good of the relationship
You left me a drunk voicemail of you describing your pizza to me at 2 AM
Please can we have sex in this office for old times sake
Jungle juice breakfast? No? Ok.
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
