he believed the zit on my nose was a piercing...until he tried to bite it. needless to say he didnt ask for my number
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
she gave him a mild concussion from throwing him against the wall in an attempt to dance with him. gotta love monday nights at the sandbar.
i saw his dick when we were four, so thats kind of ruined for me now
I just saw her punch a kid in the face.. i always knew she was the girl for me.
omg theres cum all over the american flag and now its up in front of his house.
I think its only fitting my first purchase with my student loan is a glass pipe? I think ill name it 'Subsidized'
Someone jacked my earrings off me or I threw em in the toilet again
I hate when that happens
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
In the store looking for it now. They put the theatre/script section right next to the gay erotica section. Rude. Practical, but rude.
he stole a smokey from the street meat vendor and put it in his pocket when she wasn't looking and now we're drinking avocado margaritas
I feel like shit, and I can't get the band aids off my nipples.
last night we were hooking up when all the sudden he just murmured "mm blonde". i don't know what to think about this situation.
Went home with a male stripper who looked like Justin Timberlake.. I started singing cry me a river mid sex. When he sang along I fell in love
At least I got steroids and a baguette out of the deal
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