She said if it slipped out one more time she was going to duct tape it in her vagina
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
He managed to scream "cowabunga bitch" before he went down on me. Let me know if you still like him.
We fucked to techno music while he wore shin guards... best sex ever.
Sry I came all over your dress. Think of it as a Vegas souvenir.
So my mind was like YOU ARE TOTALLY GONNA MAKE IT TO CLASS TODAY but then my body was all LOL NO YOU AIN'T.
I yelled kanye while he was fucking me. It just felt right
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
we got kicked out of the bar last night for sneaking into the back kitchen and eating handfulls of cheese in the walk in fridge
we fucked and then he hand fed me a hot pocket
I am naked and annoyed.
Her blow jobs are legen wait for it seriously like 9 people I know brag about them dary
Nothing says "Jesus has forgiven your sins" like finding out you're not pregnant on Easter.
Shes yelled my World of Warcraft name when we were having sex, I think marriage is next.
I probably should have told her I was actually the drunkest one there before she let me pierce her ear
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