Did you fuck her?
If by "fuck her" you mean "threw up on her shoes," then yes, I achieved that.
I think my emotional moodswings have reached a new low. I cried for the entire duration of changing my tampon.
I just hope this isn't happening Final Destination style
Travis Barker would totally be Devon Sawa in this scenario
Best news ive heard all week. The cougars r coming! The cougars are coming!
It was weird to see you drinking wine out a glass instead of a red cup today
Black out sex on the trampoline? yes please.
Just stepped in shit. Not sure if its mine or the dog's. Get some of our friends on the way back from work and just have the intervention now. I will totally understand.
When I got up in the middle of the night, puked in his trash can, and snuck out the front door, I pretty sure he knew it was over.
He tried to use a signal flare to light the bong
And?
He melted the stem
KETAMINE SUNDAYS ARE SERIOUSLY FUCKING ME UP!
Had to belly crawl across the floor to the toilet with my eyes closed to puke my life out without making my hangover worse. Three times.
I have a diplomatic trade for you. My pants for your rum. Tomorrow?
She could makes a perfectt roast dinner drunk but she nearly sets the kitchen alight microwaving popcorn.
Also, what day were you thinkin we should trip balls at the children's museum?
I mean I've only met the girl once and she was trying to slit some guys tires.
Randomize
