so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I'm pretty sure there is a country song about this exact situation
He's a firefighter, who has his own band. I'm pregnant just thinking about him.
She told me I reminded her of the fair. And she wanted to deep fry my dick and eat it.
Found a joint walking to class. I feel like the environment is rewarding me for being green.
He tried to say the picture wasn't him. Like I'd forget his curved boner.
isn't that the guy who always buys you drinks?
yeah. i love a man who still buys me drinks after the bar cuts me off.
next time on intervention
"Home for the holidays" isn't clearance to fuck the recently 18 year old high schooler right?
Nope, his last birthday was.
Do you think if I tell the hot Santa at work that I want a sugar daddy for Christmas that he'll get the hint?
In the last six hours i have procured a free sandwich, watched three movies, and came to orgasm. If that isn't productivity then i don't know what is.
Everyone says I win the strip club
My grandpa is driving me to get condoms and wine. This is adulthood.
Overheard a drunk girl talk about how when she's drunk she believes in more than one God
YOU TOOK A FUCKING SNAP OF ME TRYING TO PEE! I'M GOING TO FUCK YOU WITH THE BUSINESS END OF A RUTED RAKE!
I'm too pretty to be this sexually frustrated.
Randomize