The girl here has a popped collar. Can I slap her?
Yes. For all mankind please do.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
We're playing fucking games. GAMES. THIS IS BULL SHIT. IM GOING TO THROW UP ON THE BABIES AND LEAVE.
How did she break his doorknob?
That was our fault. We put a chair under the doorknob so that she wouldn't wander out of his room in the middle of the night and jump into bed with her ex. But she's stronger than we thought.
We went to Denny's and he threatened to fight an entire high school track team by himself
Once again I am on the toilet and refuse to get up
What a great time to reflect on life
The bond between me and cheese is something no man can understand.
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
I need to mount that unicorn and turn him into a full blown steed.
If there is a heaven, that's what it will be. Bagel Bites and cunnilingus.
I saved a note for myself but all it said was "am I a slutty Holden Caulfield?"
All I want is some guy to eat me out while I work on grad school things then go on his way
I drove them away with my sparkling personality and LOTR references.
she just punched him in the balls in front of everyone and yelled "YOU SEE WHAT YOU MADE ME DO"
Someone made a Christmas song to the Flintstones theme and I'm suing for emotional distress.
Randomize