i woke up next to the toilet with a chipped tooth, somebody elses shirt on, and a random guys id in my pocket
I was sleeping on the bathroom floor and thought a wet towel might keep me warm.
So recap time do u remember biting that girls hand?
If I ever die and svu has to come to my murder scene make sure they know I don't wear underwear always so it might not be as bad as they think
There's a girl in the bathroom crying about something having to do with cream cheese.
I turned around and there were three 10 year old kids running around with sparklers. Weirdest college part ever.
Welcome to Philly.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
the day has come. I have finally reached the point in my life where I just don't give a fuck about anything anymore. it's beautiful!
Is it possible to break your brain with drugs?
it is basically gonna be an ugly Christmas sweater rave
all night she kept rolling over and mumbling something about wanting an extendable retractable urethra.
I feel as though my head has drastically changed shape
Get your ass back to America. We've got a lot of drugs to do.
we're forecasting high levels of inebriation into the evening with dropping temperatures late at night
I'm not going to drink anymore, and on that note I'm not going to drink any less either, so I'll see you there. . .
Randomize
