Well how sick are u. Ive got a good immune system.
where does the pee come out of this thing
Sry I left before you woke up. The house was really fucked up and I didn't feel like helping you clean. PS Somebody threw up on your dog
The way I see it, if i don't fail the midterm and blow off some of the projects, how else am I going to get motivated to study for the final ?
Being this Hungover on Easter has brought my closer to Jesus... I swear he had to feel shitty like this after coming back from the dead
I pretty much threw up on him while he slept, I had one task today which was to wash the sheets that I threw up on and I turned them pink. I would leave me if I could
i only avoided him because he looked like he was about to have a heart attack and i didnt feel like doing cpr on my day off.
what type of emt are you
When my parents ask if I met any nice guys in California, I'm going to answer, "No, but I have gone home with alot of nice girls". Too much, too soon?
Goddamn it Peter ur the only person i know who can make going down on a girl a competition.
She won. Twice.
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
The next time you scream bombs away when you are inside me will be the last time you are inside me
Yeah. I fucked her boyfriend, she knows, and she still wants to keep dating him. That's love.
I told him. He hasn't said anything. Crying and holding cats is probably what is happening.
I wanted to have a threesome but they’re TOO HETERO
My vagina is the only part of me that is pleased you lived through last night.
Randomize
