I'm eating all of the evidence.
...I woke up with a yo yo in my underwear...
You've ruined blow jobs for me. You were the motzart of sucking dick, where every other girl is like awkward elevator music
im calling her cock vulture from now on
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
It was just a reflex. BOOM I kicked her in the face
Sitting in the library studying = googling how to get laid in the library.
And they were awkwardly all over each other in a Christian way.
It's only slutty if you don't have his number. Unless there's a full moon. Then anything goes.
Ehhh, contemplating pain killers and fruit snacks if that's any indication.
That's like doing a cinnamon challenge in my vag - but more painful.
Do you think it would be a margarita if you just out tequila in a sonic slush?
Dude, fate has brought her to your penis.
The guys who program Autocorrect have never seen a vagina in person
I'm cuddly bitch. Deal with it.
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