Bein cut off at a bar is embarassing ...until you get to the next bar.
SOME GIRL GOT MAGGOTS IN HER COOCH FROM EXPERIMENTING WITH MAYO!
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
he was terrible at kissing, so i just kept letting him motorboat me. he seemed very pleased with my choice
So he thinks I sent him a picture of my boob last night, but it was really just a close up of my arm.
Breakfast=the leftover margarita in my car. Have a great day.
I wore water proof eyeliner just incase the first picture of me of 2012 is a mugshot
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
FridayRule: If it takes you longer than 5 minutes to find a parking spot, you don't have class today
How was my weekend? I just blew my nose and a gram of coke fell out. My weekend was fantastic.
Lube filled water balloons always make for a good time
his ex girlfriend sent him a pic of her naked in the bathtub so I sent her a pic of me sucking his dick
Take off your clothes and see if he wants to have sex, that's a good way to find out
What can I say I sleep with 40 year old Cougars because my mother gave me away at birth and apparently that's why says my therapist
I think I broke my dick but 10/10 would definitely do it again.
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