Yes. UR adorable in a weird way.
u sent me just one boob. one just doesnt do it for me. u dont get full on a half a rack of ribs u need a full one
but why does your life always sound like the plot of a porn?
just found more coke in my pocket. i love not washing my jeans after every individual use.
I find it ironic that im starting my birth control on mothers day.
I got a job at a micro-brewery. Now who made the bigger mistake, them or me?
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I told her the maid must have stolen all my condoms. She bought it
He just ordered a bottle of Beam at an Italian place for us to share.
Dude, you like sabotaged my shower time by walking in and eating a snack pack on the toilet. That's messed up on levels that haven't even been created.
I saw a classic trojan enz laying on his desk. So he's probably not into the kinky shit.
So if i am talking to a guy and he sends me a pic and he is wearing Spiderman button down dress shirt.... Is it ok if i dont want to talk to him anymore?
Question: the touchscreen on my phone randomly quit working, do you think this could be a latent reaction from me peeing on my phone last weekend?
just went home with a guy that made fun of me in elementary school. this blow job is not going well for him.
I got paid to fuck my boss for lunch. My job is better than yours.
Randomize
