and now I know what throwing up pineapple chunks is like.
Yeah, we had those soaking in vodka for like 36 hours
outstanding.
Real housewives of new joisy starts MONDAY. Skype session after? Virtual slap the bag?
something isn't right. i offered to be his sex slave and he declined..
went from writing my paper to watching obamas speech to crushing beers and singing springsteen in a crowd of 100 within 20 minutes. I love this country
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
I think she was eating a cup of ramen noodles while we banged, or had a seizure
I either just got free sex or a nice jail sentence. Text me in 10 to verify.
That does it. We're drinking til we're pirates.
I have the WORST cramps EVER. I think this is gods way of saying 'you're welcome, last warning. stop being a slut.'
YOU GAVE HIM A BLOWJOB ON YOUR DOORSTEP?!
and Katie got too high with the tow truck driver and wants to go home
Woke up with an e-cig stuck in my asshole. Explain.
His exact words: "I don't have anything you can't treat with antibiotics."
It's best not to have your booty call on social media. So if they post stupid shit, you still want to fuck them.
i just want a beer and a blow job. is that so much to ask?
and i just want a ring so i can stop faking it. is that?
Randomize
