She made me repeat after her: "I take responsibility for what I put in my own mouth."
Is it standard protocol to defriend someone after they give you chlamydia?
I found those 18 whoppers we bought.
Had to have a serious talk with my liver and remind it that it is my birthday weekend and there are three more nights like last night ahead of us
I cleared a drunken path to my bed for you. If you hit clothes you've gone too far.
Dude, someone broke the toilet seat in two, the is a pair of panties on the kitchen counter, and the entire house smells like a brewery
We made a water bong out of a wine bottle... Being an architect major finally payed off.
hot boxing the bathroom at chili's. where the fuck are you, it's too big of a box for just one person.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Any day that has a special name thats capitalized means you need to need to call in sick and get day drunk. That's why they are there.
Got it in all night, now at a bar at 730 am and we are the only two people here. Somewhere my mid twenties father is applauding me.
The teenager outdrank all of us. All. Of. Us. I woke up and she was getting everyone water and fruit snacks. I give up.
Just had to double check that I had pants on. THAT kind of weekend.
Why r u in my phone under "the last survivor"?
I wouldn't have found her if it wasn't for the vomit trail leading into my brother's room.
Randomize
