Its like we are women, and boise state is a gangster rap song. This game is degrading
I walked up to a girl in a bar, and all I was capable of doing was taking my beer and bumping it up to hers. While doing so, all I could say was "Bud Light". She walked away.
Weed smoke burps in the boss's face. Job security.
THERE IS THE SEXIEST BEARDED MAN HERE. I CAME EVERYWHERE.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
Did we literally take a cab across the street
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
Just picked up an ounce of keif and if it goes to waste before the world ends I'm gonna haunt the shit out of somebody when we all die.
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
Walked in the bathroom at work and my boss was taking a shit with the stall wide open and responded "oh yeah, I forgot you never have been to prison "
Made a pinky promise to a lesbian on crack in WeHo. No one knows what I promised
Just had my first american. He tasted like freedom.
No, the high point was when you stood on a chair and shouted you were the god of tits and wine.
Oh, in response to your "does dating get better" question...I feel like penises are getting smaller nowadays. Its been several years since I saw a good 8+ incher.
Just threw up in a baggy on the airplane. The guys next to me clapped and bought me a jack and coke.
Livin the dream
Randomize